A QUALITY PUBLICATION FROM THE PUBLISHER OF SOME OF THE BEST BLOGS YOU NEVER HEARD ABOUT

He was not a show off. Indeed, he would have been mortally offended at the very suggestion. But the present circumstances didn't allow him a lot of dignity. He could not keep the hostage with him forever. The smell was getting to him.

The ransom clip to be broadcast live over all of outland would have to do the trick. He could imagine the targets cringing in fear backed up against the wall opposite their TV sets. The fact that he had a dwarf for a cameraman didn't help his ego either. The place was dead flat. Not a rock to set the dwarf on.

He had learnt that complaining never helps. Things need to be gotten over with. Or they never get done. He winced.

"Roll camera!" he spat. The dwarf fainted.